On behalf of Mohajer Law Firm, APC posted in child custody and parenting plans on Thursday, July 12, 2018.
If you’re a divorced parent sharing custody of your kids, you know that your parenting schedule can change with the seasons, and maybe even more frequently. Moving to a summer schedule and then back to a school year schedule can be difficult for children — particularly younger ones.
Children of divorced parents need as much consistency and predictability as possible. They want to know whose house they’ll be in and who will be taking them to or picking them up from school and other activities. If their parents’ breakup is still recent, they may have anxiety that their parents will forget about them.
Likely you and your co-parent have your parenting schedule on a calendar. Many parents use a shared calendar like those included in co-parenting apps. By giving your children access to your calendar, you can reduce their stress.
If your children are too young for an online calendar, print it out and let them make it their own using crayons, glitter, and stickers. Then they can hang it prominently in their rooms or keep it in their backpack.
You can make the decoration of the calendar a fun, shared activity with your children. This also gives them a chance to ask any questions they have about the schedule or anything else that might be on their mind as they adjust to dividing their time between households.
Each parent should also have a copy of the calendar displayed in his or her home so that the kids always know where to find it. If you have to make any changes, make sure that the modifications are reflected on everyone’s calendars. Having continuity across households can go a long way towards reducing kids’ anxiety after divorce.
These calendars are usually color-coded so that it’s easy for kids (and parents) to see whose house the kids will be in on any given day. Depending on a child’s age and preferences, you can print out a weekly calendar or a monthly one.
Of course, parenting schedules and the broader parenting plans often require modification over the years as kids’ needs and parents’ circumstances change. If you need to seek a modification to your parenting plan or your co-parent is asking for one, it’s essential to seek the guidance of your California family law attorney to help you through the process and protect your interests.