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On behalf of Mohajer Law Firm, APC on Thursday, December 6, 2018. You and your significant other never got married, but you did have two children together. Now that you’ve decided to end your relationship, you want to make sure that you still get to see the kids. You don’t want to lose that access. This could lead to the creation of a legal custody and parenting plan, which you both need to follow after it gets authorized by the court. The plan explains both your rights and your obligations. It sets apart time for each of you to spend with the children. It determines where they live. In essence, it sets up your roles as parents even when you are no longer together. What impacts the plan? The court does have a lot of authority here, whether you’re a married couple getting a divorce or an unmarried couple trying to work out a plan for your children. The court considers numerous different factors to decide who should get custody and how to divide rights. In general, most courts do strive for a roughly equal split that keeps both you and your ex involved in the children’s lives. But that does not mean it is a guarantee. Some of the factors that affect custody and parenting plans include: 1. The parents’ physical health. Do you and your ex have any health problems that may make it harder to care for the kids? 2. The parents’ mental health. Parents struggling with certain disorders may not be fit to care for the children alone. 3. A stable, consistent environment at home. The court tries to reduce the impact on the kids by giving them a stable routine that is most like the home life they already know. 4. Where the children go to school. Ideally, custody orders will not force them to change schools. 5. Community involvement. Again, the court tries to find a solution that allows the children to be in the same programs, have the same friends and keep the same peer groups. 6. The gender and age of the kids. Even if both parents stay involved, does it make more sense for the children to live primarily with one parent for the time being? 7. What the child actually wants. The older children get, the more weight the court tends to give to their decisions and their preferences. 8. Any evidence of abuse in the home, whether it is physical, emotional, mental, financial or any other type. 9. Any evidence of criminal activity or an environment that puts the kids at risk. This could include a history of drug use or drunk driving, for instance. 10.The relationships that the children have with everyone in the house. This could include looking at relationships with siblings or grandparents, for example, or determining who is the child’s primary caretaker. As you and your ex work your way through this process, keep these factors in mind. Find out what you can do to protect your parental rights and that relationship with your kids.

On behalf of Mohajer Law Firm, APC on Wednesday, November 7, 2018. As a part of any divorce including children, the court hands down a custody order, or approves a custody plan that parents agree on together. Unfortunately, many parents have difficulty sticking to the custody plan and deprive other parents of time with their child. While it is normal for parents to take time to adjust to a new structure of parenting, it is never wise to contradict a custody order. Courts take the terms of custody orders seriously, and expect parents to respect them as well. If you and your child’s other parent face difficulty parenting according to the order, you may want to consider modifying the order to something more manageable. However, some parents do not value the rights and parenting time of others, or are too self-involved to realize how their actions affect others. If your child’s other parent does not respect your rights as a parent, they may face serious repercussions from the court. Depriving a parent of their parenting time Your custody order should outline when you have custody of your child and may even include how and when you exchange custody with the other parent. Whenever one parent’s behavior keeps the other parent from spending their court-ordered parenting time with their child, it typically qualifies as direct parenting time interference. Some parents take things to the extreme and kidnap their child, taking them to another state or country. Not only is this certainly direct parenting time interference, it may also be a criminal act: It may bring down criminal charges, possibly resulting in jail time. In other cases, a parent may simply forget to exchange custody repeatedly or constantly show up late to the exchange. This is obviously less troublesome than a kidnapping, but is still a problem in the eyes of the court. Undermining the other parent’s relationship with their child Even if neither parent obstructs the other parent’s time with their child, they may still cause myriad complications and undermine each other. One parent may speak poorly about the other parent in front of the child, or may not allow the other parent to communicate with the child. Any time that one parent’s actions obstruct the other parent’s relationship with their child, it may qualify as indirect parenting time interference. This type of behavior is more difficult to identify. You may need to examine your circumstances closely. If you believe that the other parent is obstructing your parenting time, make sure that you understand your legal options. Time with your child is one of the most precious things you have, so do not hesitate to keep it protected.

On behalf of Mohajer Law Firm, APC on Thursday, October 25, 2018. You have probably heard that money issues sit at the root of a lot of divorce cases. However, maybe you think the issue is always a lack of money and financial assets. A man with an addiction problem leaves his family with nothing. A woman who is a sole breadwinner and loses her job finds her family breaking up under the stress. A couple that can’t make ends meet has to end their marriage. These things do happen, and you can find plenty of people who have been through it, but does that mean that wealth insulates you from divorce? No, not at all. Even wealthy couples can get divorced because of issues that ultimately revolve around money. Here are a few ways it can happen. You look at money differently You are wealthy now, but you did not have much growing up. As a result, you love to save your money. You know how valuable it is and how hard you worked for it. Your spouse, however, has always had more than enough. They just like to spend, assuming there will always be more. This difference in the way you view your financial assets can cause a lot of stress. Your spouse may feel like you are too controlling when you tell them to rein in their spending. At the same time, you may feel like your spouse is wasting all the money you earn. Either way, it’s a problem. You keep financial secrets Marriages are built on trust and communication. Keeping secrets about anything is problematic. However, money is one of the things most often at the heart of these secrets. Maybe you do not want to tell your spouse about your spending because you know they wouldn’t approve. Maybe you’re keeping secret accounts in case you ever need them. Secrets can put a rift between you and your spouse and can lead to divorce when they finally come to light. Your levels of control are not the same Your spouse takes care of your finances. At first, you enjoyed it. You don’t like paying bills anyway. As the marriage went on, though, you started to realize that your spouse was controlling you. In time, it becomes impossible for you to make your own financial decisions. This type of controlling attitude may even constitute financial abuse. It is not healthy. It can make you feel trapped in the relationship. Adults need to be equal in a marriage, and when this type of financial inequality becomes clear, it may lead to divorce. Your rights These are just three examples, but they help show how wealth does not protect you from divorce. Make sure you know your rights if you and your spouse split up.

On behalf of Mohajer Law Firm, APC on Tuesday, October 9, 2018. You know that you’re not going to feel happy about any child custody strategy when you and your spouse split up. Even if you feel good about splitting your time with the children — you know it is important for them to see both parents — you can’t change the fact that they face a lot of turmoil. They have to move to two new houses, jumping back and forth between them. They may lose their friends, neighbors and even schools. It’s certainly not ideal. If you worry about this, one potential solution is bird-nesting. It’s worth considering, as it may solve your problems without cutting either parent out of the kids’ lives. What is it? Bird-nesting is simple. The kids don’t move. You do. You and your spouse set up a rotation to move in and out of the home. For instance, you both rent apartments near the house. The children stay, and you live with them for the first week. Your ex lives in his or her apartment. At the end of the week, you move into your apartment and your ex moves into the house. It continues like this until the children grow up and move out of the house. The home is your nest. It’s your base. It’s a place where the kids can feel confident and secure. Remember, children value the patterns and routines in their lives. Your son doesn’t want two sets of toys. Your daughter loves her bedroom. Both of your children like their schools and have close bonds with their classmates. Moving is normal for many adults, but it is a huge deal to kids. It’s jarring and upsetting. Nesting protects them from that. What are the downsides? Nothing is perfect. There are some downsides. For one thing, you and your ex continue to share that same house, so you have to deal with one another on a fairly close basis. If you feel frustrated that your spouse doesn’t clean up enough around the house, for instance, that’s going to continue being a problem after the divorce. The main downside, for many couples, is money. In the situation outlined above, you — as in you and your ex — need to rent two apartments and still pay the mortgage on your family home. That’s why bird-nesting is perfect in a high-asset divorce. You do not worry about the cost. You worry about the children. What makes their lives the best after you split up? If that’s your focus, bird-nesting may be the solution. Your options As you can see, it is important to carefully think over every option you have during divorce. Put your children first and make sure you know your rights.

On behalf of Mohajer Law Firm, APC on Tuesday, September 11, 2018. As a man who is leaving a relationship with children, you want to make sure you protect yourself. In your relationship, you struggled with physical and psychological abuse. You were constantly told you were stupid, ignorant and worthless. Your spouse would attack you without warning. This is the last thing you want for your children, but how can you approach such a sensitive topic? You know you’re not the likeliest victim, but will the courts understand? Men do suffer from domestic violence, too The reality for many men is that domestic violence comes from their spouses and not from them. They may be attacked by wives or husbands, just as a woman might be attacked by her wife or husband. Everyone can become a victim of domestic violence, and the law does recognize this. No court will want to see a child in an abusive home, so proving that domestic violence is a problem in yours will help you obtain the custody rights you want. The judge wants to know any decision about your child’s care is in your child’s best interests, and knowing about domestic violence is key to any argument you have. In a national study by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, it was found that more men than women are victims of intimate partner violence, both physical and psychological. In fact, research since the 1970s has long suggested that men and women commit violence against one another at roughly similar rates. Men often were ridiculed when reporting violence, but as times have changed, that’s stopped. More men report violence today than in the past, which is why it’s better understood today. Is there a gender bias against men in court? There should not be a bias against men or women in any case in court. Your attorney is there to protect you against unfair biases and to make sure your concerns are heard and met with respect. You deserve to be safe in your relationship, and your child or children do, too. It’s important for you to speak up about violence, whether it’s physical, emotional or financial, so the court understands what you and your children have been though. Only with this knowledge is it possible for a judge to make a fair determination about the parenting rights and abilities of each person involved in a custody case. It’s something that has to be brought to the surface quickly.